Things You Don’t Realize You Do When You’re Feeling Rejected

Image result for break upFeeling Rejected or Criticized : How to Become More Self Aware and Empowered, Rather than Reactive and Isolated

It’s inevitable, isn’t it? Feeling rejected or criticized.

You may currently be feeling rejected by a romantic partner, although I am sure you can also relate to feeling rejected or criticized by a friend, mentor, teacher, employer, family member, parent, etc.

We are complex creatures and our emotions, behaviors and thoughts/assumptions are extremely personal to us. Our reality may be a product of our irrational fears, insecurities, and/or ego, yes. However, that doesn’t make our experience of pain any less real.

We may go through periods of our life feeling rejected or isolated, as if no one truly takes the time to really give a d*mn. It sucks. I’ve been there. Sometimes, still go there emotionally with my relationships. It’s normal.

We are allowed to be sensitive beings, you know.

    All my life I have been told I am “too sensitive,” as if my emotional experiences were something to be ashamed of. Maybe I am “too sensitive” to someone on the outside, but on the inside, I have to be authentic to myself and my own experience. When things affect me, I’m not good at hiding it. In fact, I actually love that about myself now.

#Sorry not sorry

We shouldn’t have to apologize for our sensitivities, however, we should be responsible for trying to be mindful of our reactions and assumptions. As these can often lead to us pushing our partners away, only intensifying our experience of feeling rejected and alone.

Relationships are a two-way street, my friend. You cannot speed and drive recklessly, while expecting everyone else to abide by the rules. You need to take accountability of the accident without blame and work toward the greater good together.

The biggest thing that I have learned about my sensitivities, is that there is nothing wrong with them; but rather, me being unaware of how I was using them to victimize myself, was the problem.

When I was feeling rejected or criticized, (which again was often), I would get so upset internally that my innate reactions would be to either get aggressive and pushy, demanding a resolution to make the panic of abandonment go away… or I would shut down immediately and become withdrawn and bitter, only fueling myself with loneliness. In retrospect, I really wanted someone to protect me, yet, if I were to be honest with myself, I wouldn’t let them.

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